Wrestling fans the world over mourn tonight as WWE was finally able to give them something they requested. Matt Hardy’s Broken gimmick is a go, and people could not be more happy as they prepare to despise every single detail about it.
As required by law, the moment that WWE actually books someone the way fans want, it is necessary that they completely switch opinions. Industry insiders project that the flimsy excuse will be the use of #WOKEN instead of #BROKEN, and probably also some reasoning that involves you know who.
“I can already see it, man.” said the internet wrestling expert we spoke to, whose impressive resume includes attending nearly a dozen live shows and subscribing to Meltzer. “They’re not even going to put the title on him in the much bigger company with much bigger stars. It’s bullshit.”
Matt Hardy could not be reached for comment and we did not have the 16 years required to listen to Reby Hardy comment on anything. There were some lawns we noticed nearbye that were just gloriously destroyed though.
Dislaimer: False Finish is satirical news. Any reflection of reality is your own damned fault.
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